Tuesday, Sept. 2, 2003 | 8:29 a.m.
Those crazy Canadians.
It seems a woman in Montreal who gave birth to a healthy baby that had developed in her abdomen rather than in her womb has given researchers renewed hope for impregnating a man.
No, we are not discussing how that would work.
But according to the Toronto Globe and Mail, "Scientists have argued for years that there is no scientific barrier" to making a man pregnant.
Oh, but there are barriers.
Brooks Brothers' "Bun In the Oven" clothing line, for starters.
And the baby shower possibilities are positively horrifying.
Can you imagine a bunch of guys sitting around watching an NFL game and sampling baby food from jars that have had the labels removed?
"This tastes like (poopy). Hey, Jake. You got any that tastes like pretzels?"
This definitely would be a realm for Metrosexuals, as swollen ankles would make wearing bowling shoes difficult, and stretch mark cream doesn't come in Old Spice or Brut flavors.
I am not sure we need a way for both men and women to procreate.
Although it might mean child care and family leave would be fully funded and encouraged.
A woman in Portland, Ore., has written -- and is poised to make a living by selling -- a book that tells city dwellers how to raise chickens.
I want to know how people sell these book proposals.
Barbara Kilarski's "Keep Chickens! Tending Small Flocks in Cities" attributes the rising popularity of city chickens partly to Baby Boomers who want to own chickens as their grandmothers did.
My grandmother raised chickens. They nearly pecked me senseless the one time I wandered into the chicken yard. Must have been the country air.
Kilarski's book discusses how to raise chickens for eggs and companionship, not for nuggets and barbecue sauce.
At least, not for a few years.
Maybe that's the topic of the sequel: "Reap Chickens! Turning Small Flocks Into Big Eats in Cities."
September is national "Safe Baby Month," and a Las Vegas registered nurse will give free workshops about protecting children from heat and abusive parents.
"Nevada is rated in the top five states in the nation regarding child abuse and child deaths, and to the rest of the county it definitely appears that our focus is not our children, but our gaming and industry," said Pamela S. Rowse, a co-founder of the national Shaken Baby Coalition.
Rowse said the recent reports of children left to die in hot, locked vehicles -- and the lack of adequate laws to prosecute the adults responsible -- spurred her to broaden her presentations this year.
"The kids in hot cars is the one thing that really triggered me," said Rowse, who works part time in the St. Rose Hospital emergency room. "If you don't renew your car registration or you don't renew your driver's license, what happens?"
Free workshops, titled "Kids in Hot Cars" and "Infants and Sun Protection," are scheduled from noon to 4 p.m. Sept. 13 at the Babies R Us store at Rainbow and Lake Mead boulevards. A free, two-hour workshop on shaken baby syndrome is to begin at 9 a.m. Sept. 24.
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