Las Vegas Sun

March 28, 2024

Would you vote for a guy named Peg Leg Liver Jones?

Newt, aka Peg Leg

Scott Harrison/Retna

We don’t know what the elephant’s name is, but the guy on the left has an awesome blues handle. His wife’s is Sticky Liver Jones.

Assessing presidential candidates is a very individual, inexact science. Some voters are swayed much more by their guts than by the nitty-gritty of a policy platform. Others have a thing about the face and the hair, the statement made by the color of the tie and the cut of the suit. Names also cast certain shadows, which might be why all four of the major contenders left in the race for the Republican nomination go by nicknames.

Just for fun, I put Newt, Mitt, Rick and Ron through the “What’s Your Blues Name?” chart recently featured on The Huffington Post. Imagine standing in the voting booth, pledging your allegiance to one of the following:

Newton Leroy Gingrich = Peg Leg Liver Jones

Willard Mitt Romney = Screamin’ Gumbo Jefferson

Richard John Santorum = Skinny Fingers Davis

Ronald Earnest Paul = Skinny Eyes Bradley

And the current POTUS? The guy with the name that has given rise to all kinds of controversy and inventive bumper stickers?

Barack Hussein Obama = Buddy Hips King

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