Las Vegas Sun

March 28, 2024

EDITORIAL:

Success of Major League Baseball All-Star Game brings no joy to Trumpville

Editor’s note: With a tip of the cap to Ernest Lawrence Thayer, we offer this 21st-century update of his iconic poem about America’s Pastime. Our version focuses on House Minority Leader Kevin McCarthy, R-Calif., who has led his party’s attack on Major League Baseball for moving the All-Star Game over opposition to the GOP’s recently approved voter laws in Georgia. McCarthy accuses Democrats, specifically President Joe Biden, of misleading MLB about the law. Democrats say the blame for the game’s relocation lies with Republicans for passing laws suppressing the vote among minorities. And with that, we offer ...

The feeling wasn’t happy for the Trumpville folks that day

The score stood 4 to 2, with but one inning more to play

And then when Harper homered, touching off a mighty cheer

The GOPers ground their teeth and grumbled in their beers

 

They’d hoped and prayed this match would be a legendary dud

So as they saw heard these joyous shouts, it really boiled their blood

To them this wasn’t just a harmless game between All-Stars

But yet another chance to play their “I’m a victim!” card.

 

They’d screamed and yelled when MLB had made the fateful call

That Georgia wouldn’t be the place where fans would hear “Play ball!”

They wailed of wokeness, cancel culture, forces on the left

And never mind that their own party prompted all this mess

 

“We’ll boycott!” they all thundered; their outrage dialed to 10.

“We’ll never take a Delta flight or drink a Coke again!

“We’ll stay away from stadiums and tune out MLB

“We’ll drive these jokers out of business, just you wait and see.”

 

But Trumpville needed someone to become its alpha dog

To spread its bogus narrative and be a Fox News hog

McCarthy said, “I’ll do it!” And with that the die was cast

The party crowd was confident with Kevin at the bat

 

He fumed at companies alarmed at GOP intentions

To limit voter access and to undermine elections

He tried his best to cower them; he postured and he huffed

And Trumpville? Well, they loved it; they just couldn’t get enough

 

In Trumpville they exclaimed with joy, “We’ve got’ em on the run!

“The game will be a shambles — it’s going to be such fun

“The fans will get behind us, and when you see the stands

“The crowd’ll be so tiny you could count them on two hands.”

 

But as the game approached the gleeful outlook would turn sour

The tickets started selling and were gone in a few hours

And Denver’s mayor said merrily, while standing strong and proud,

The city was preparing for a massive tourist crowd

 

Still Trumpville had its hopes alive, if even just a prayer

That for the party killjoys, vindication would be theirs

And as they slumbered in their beds the night before the game

They dreamed that Kevin would devise a way to win the day

 

But as we know the evening wouldn’t turn out as they’d wished

The game was well-attended; the action was delish

The politics were stripped away, the fans all smiles and laughter

They cheered for Trout, Tatis and Mookie, before, during and after.

 

And Coke and Delta? They went on with business just as usual

They barely faced a ripple from McCarthy’s mean accusals

So as with threats to boycott over football players kneeling

The flap left little damage — except to Trumpville’s feelings.

 

Oh, somewhere in this favored land the sun is shining bright

The band is playing somewhere, and somewhere hearts are light

And somewhere men are laughing, and somewhere children shout

But there is no joy in Trumpville — the mighty Kevin has struck out.