If Area 51 doesn’t exist, why is everyone laughing?

Wednesday, March 27, 1996 | 11:59 a.m.

What is wrong with this story? There is a place 150 miles north of Las Vegas that is kept secret. OK, nothing wrong with that. But then, there is a passenger plane flying from McCarran Airport carrying 80-120 people to this secret place every day. The Air Force and all the officials say this place does not exist. There is freight going to this nonexistent place. People working at this nonexistent place are getting their paychecks every month. In the mountains around Rachel and on other roads going to Groom Lake, security guards are guarding with deadly force a place that does not even exist. Strange.

The federal government is paying billions of dollars every year from its black budget for a place that does not exist. You can buy officials maps taken by the Russian and French satellites showing some installation at Groom Lake resembling an air base. Can we sue the Russians and the French for selling fake photos?

The whole world is laughing. Both East and West have maps and knowledge about Area 51. Only Americans and their representatives in Washington are aware that this place does not exist. Where is the real truth?

And the question remains: All these people suing the U.S. government and claiming they got ill working at this nonexistent place -- what will happen to them?

Name withheld