Tuesday, March 25, 1997 | 11:59 a.m.
Oscar? Sorry, we here at People in the News can't take seriously any awards ceremony named after a Sylvester Stallone comedy, even if Goldie Hawn did show up in a quasi-see-through dress. After all, movies have very little to do with real life as lived by everyday Americans; for that, we, like you, turn to small-circulation Washington, D.C., public-affairs magazines. And it doesn't get more real than this: the New Republic spanking the New York Times magazine for fluffing up Johnnie Cochran in one of its nerfball "At Lunch With" profiles. "Johnnie L. Cochran Jr. is one of those few people whom it is the proper business of a decent society to absolutely scorn," the New Republic editors say icily. "He enabled a rich man to get away with bloody murder ... by resorting to wild untruths and by the lowest and coarsest exploitation of racial hostility." The New York Times, they sermonize, "joins him in the performance. Next week in the paper of record: 'Afternoon Tea with Tim McVeigh."' Guys, quit sugarcoating your opinions.
Don't bother checking your local listings
Brian Bosworth is one of those people whom it is the proper business of a decent society to absolutely scorn, but alas, Fox's TV programmers have beaten us to the punch. They've canceled his action show, "Lawless," after one airing, long before we had a chance to ridicule it, or even see it. "Lawless" joins such TV crib-deaths as "South of Sunset" (1993) and "Public Morals" (1996), neither of which made it to a second episode.
Cracked fashion plates
Alas, it appears we can't avoid Academy Awards clean-up duty; here, then, a dustpan full of final notes and impressions, if only to note with some surprise that Courtney Love cleans up well. You might have expected the trashy diva to show up in some retina-searing outre-wear, but no: She looked very chic in a sassy white satin gown by Versace and diamond necklace. Hey Courtney, where's rumored boy pal Edward Norton? "Edward who?" she said. "I'm engaged to Kevin Spacey ... I'm kidding." Love's unexpected good taste meant that Goldie Hawn -- Goldie Hawn? -- had to carry the night's provocative-dress duties. Her see-throughish number had official greeter Army Archerd sputtering, "Oh, my, Goldie, you have no mercy." At the last minute, someone came up with a ticket to the show for Hustler pervie Larry Flynt -- previously denied a ticket by the Columbia studio. He was inside even as a plane trailed a banner overhead proclaiming, "Columbia sucks. Signed, Larry Flynt." And, of course, no Oscar fashion roundup would be complete without mention of Dennis Rodman, who showed up in a bizarre Mad Hatter ensemble, a huge top hat and red-white-and blue tails. Just the thing for afternoon tea with Tim McVeigh.
Compiled by Scott Dickensheets
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