Thursday, June 4, 1998 | 9:29 a.m.
In future editions of Webster's dictionary, when you look up the word "snarky,"no doubt there you will find a picture of David Spade.
"I can't get away from snarky," Spade says. "I never heard of that word until I started getting reviewed. I don't hear it in real life. I think it means smart-assy."
Spade, who looks like Dennis the Menace all grown up, is the "Saturday Night Live" alumnus famous for his "buh-bye," a farewell so dripping with insincerity as to be the verbal equivalent of a kick in the pants, and for such other maddeningly condescending characters as Dick Clark's officious ("...and you are?") receptionist.
He's also the breakout comic actor from "Just Shoot Me," NBC's tart 'n' smart ensemble sitcom that next fall inherits the crucial Tuesday 9 p.m. "Frasier" slot. ("Frasier" moves to the even more crucial Thursday 9 p.m. slot vacated by "Seinfeld.") And he's the skinny half of the movie team that starred in "Tommy Boy" and "Black Sheep," and that, until partner Chris Farley's drug-overdose death earlier this year, seemed on the way to achieving the status of a post-modern Laurel and Hardy. On Saturday he'll play the Joint at the Hard Rock, doing his stand-up act.
On the phone, he seems both laconic and reflective, sobered not only by Farley's death, and the recent death of comedian Phil Hartman, both former colleagues on "SNL" (over the years, the show also lost John Belushi to a drug overdose and Gilda Radner to cancer), but also by his own youthful brush with capricious tragedy. Of the recent Hartman murder/suicide he says: "Other than just kind of having my world rocked, it just shows you that there's no stable ground, no rhyme or reason to it."
When Spade was 21 and just starting out in stand-up, his best friend, with whom he'd teamed on stage and whom he'd known through high school, was killed in a motorcycle crash. "That lit a fire under my ass to start stand-up the next day for sure and quit screwing around," he recalls, "and that was the first time I realized you don't have to be old to die.
"And then Farley to my left, Phil Hartman to my right -- it just shows you, you better work hard, play hard and have fun, because it could be you tomorrow, and there's no reason it can't be.
"It's just upsetting ... all the people that seem to survive that don't deserve to. Saddam Hussein -- we can't kill the guy if we try, and the good ones go."
Perhaps that sense of fatalism is why Spade also seems in no hurry to capitalize on his multimedia success. "I don't want to get too locked down in anything and I take it as it comes," he says. "Movies are so hard and the odds are so against you to do well that I really just want to take it easy and not do it unless I want to. I've got enough money now to pay the bills, so I can kind of wait, because you get one or two shots, then people give up on you.
" 'Tommy Boy' and 'Black Sheep' opening No. 1 (at the box office) helped me in a way, but it's also, is it because of Farley? Who knows? Or is it because of we were together? What about on my own?"
Those are questions that soon may have an answer. Later this month, Spade begins shooting "Lost and Found," a Warner Bros. picture that he co-wrote with J.B. Cook, a "comedian buddy" and "probably" his opening act at the Joint. Asked for the movie's pitch line, he replies: "Boy meets girl, boy likes girl, boy can't get close to girl, so boy kidnaps her dog and then pretends to help her find it."
Another important question mark hangs over "Just Shoot Me," which also stars George Segal and Laura San Giacomo: In its new fall spot on the NBC schedule, where it faces ABC's "Spin City," starring Michael J. Fox, will it be able to do what "Frasier" did to "Home Improvement," namely spin "City" several rungs down the ratings ladder?
" 'Spin City's' a great show," Spade says, "that's the bummer. It scares me, but if we wound up winning, it would be a bigger win and we would be more valuable than being on Thursday," in the "Seinfeld" slot.
An added irony in the match-up is that on "SNL," Spade was known for his Michael J. Fox imitation. "I can imagine a promo where I do him, and then I can see a promo with him doing me," Spade says. "I'm just glad 'King of the Hill' ain't up against us." (Fox is moving the animated "King" to Tuesdays, but it will compete against NBC's "Mad About You" -- "That's going to be a battle royale," Spade says.)
Fate's played its hand more than once in Spade's career. If he hadn't agreed to "Just Shoot Me," his managers were talking about pairing him in a sitcom with Tea Leoni ("The Naked Truth"). If Farley had lived, he and Spade probably would have reunited this summer for a movie updating "The Hardy Boys." That movie would have been "wearing costumes and going undercover and bumping into each other," Spade says. "Try to keep it smart, but keep it kind of goofy. That's the tricky part."
Prime-time exposure has meant a new level of interest in Spade's live stand-up too. "It's still fun, it's just that the crowds are getting bigger, and the energy's a lot more and it's hard to kinda match it," he says.
Spade's played Las Vegas (and the Joint) before, and he loves the city. "We went and saw (magician) Lance Burton and played some nickel slots," he recalls of the last time he "got to bop around" town, and he wonders if this time it will be too warm for golf. Spade's not much of a gambler, he says, but "my buddy Norm MacDonald (another "SNL" veteran, best known as the former "Weekend Update" anchor), he's like Joe Gamble, so he's the one who keeps throwing down a thousand bucks at a time."
In his stand-up stand, expect Spade to do some Las Vegas jokes, too. This one, for example: "I walked through the Hard Rock Cafe and said, 'Look, honey, there's Ike Turner's first subpoena.' " Or perhaps this: "I saw 'Legends in Concert.' It was Jimi Hendrix, Elvis and Laura Brannigan. I think they're throwing the word 'legend' around too loosely these days. I think Laura Brannigan better open with 'Gloria,' close with 'Gloria' and do it a few times in the middle."
Now that's snarky.
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