People who drive fast cars shouldn’t throw stones … or stomp down the pit lane

By Ron Kantowski

Monday, May 26, 2008 | 11:23 p.m.

NOW

--- A day after the Indy 500 virtually all of the once-a-year auto racing writers still were complaining that Danica Patrick wasn't allowed to confront fellow driver Ryan Briscoe after the two collided in the pit lane during one of those "racing accidents" that was Briscoe's fault. What none of them -- and Danica herself -- apparently remember is how Ms. Patrick spun under the yellow flag during her rookie race in 2005 and took out three cars, including two driven by Panther Racing teammates Tomas Scheckter and Tomas Enge, both of whom were in the hunt for a top-five finish. Still, that highlight of Danica stomping her feet with steam coming out of her helmet did more for the Indy Racing League than had she finished seventh or eighth, which is the best she was going to do had Briscoe not pulled out in front of her as if the pit lane were the parking lot at Albertson's.

--- Scott Dixon was handed a check worth $2.99 million Monday night for winning the Indy 500, which means he almost will have enough money to fill up his car with gas before heading to this weekend's race in Milwaukee.

--- I saw some neighborhood kids playing Wiffle ball Monday when an argument broke out. Apparently, the big kid with the freckles had hit a long ball that landed on the SUV across the street for an apparent home run. But the skinny kid with braces said the ball first struck the willow tree the SUV was parked under, meaning the ball was still in play. When I went to water the shrubs a couple of hours later, I noticed the SUV had a bright yellow line painted on it and the willow tree was missing a couple of branches.

THEN

--- Every time I see a maple baseball bat shatter into a million pieces it makes me thankful that they weren't around when I was a kid. Because when a bat shatters into a million pieces, you can't use a couple of wood screws and electrician's tape to put it back together, and then what the heck would we have used to play sandlot ball?