Columnist John Katsilometes: Taking a spin on Vanna's 'Wheel'

John Katsilometes is the Sun assistant features editor. His column appears Mondays. Reach him at [email protected] or 259-2327.

A small thong -- er, throng -- gathered inside the Wheel of Fortune Live Onstage Theatre on Friday. There were blondes, brunettes, redheads, a couple of leggy ladies in purple-dyed hair and a few even topped with a tasteful mauve.

Almost all were wearing low-cut, rhinestone-encrusted evening gowns. The vast majority were sashaying endorsements for the art of cosmetic surgery and cosmetology, and every one longed to meet the high priestess of game shows, Vanna White.

The event was the crowing of six new hostesses of the "Wheel of Fortune Live Onstage" show at the MGM. The show is scheduled to run Tuesdays through Sundays, beginning Dec. 23, at a price of $17.50. It's modeled after the original "Wheel," the country's top-rated game show for nearly two decades, which is more popular than even "The Price Is Right," starring my hero Bob Barker and featuring the ever-wonderful gimmick game "Plinko" as well as some of the most resilient hostesses in the history of television.

Anyway ...

Around 130 women, most of them dancers at various Las Vegas casinos and/or clubs, took the stage in front of competitors and a panel of five judges. Each entrant was required to walk to the right of the big "Wheel of Fortune" letter panel, flick her wrist in a saucy manner, then glide over to a stand-up microphone and say something like, "Here's what you've won! A Sony entertainment center and a three-day, two-night trip to Bimini!"

The criteria, said producer Harry Friedman, was subjective but seemingly based on the following criteria (in no particular order): poise, enunciation, wardrobe/hair, and hooters.

Vanna was supposed to make an appearance one hour into the show. But after 90 minutes, 79 contestants and two breaks in the action for a "group stretch," Vanna had not shown up.

Friedman was torqued at this, and after a break at the hour-and-a-half mark called up the 80th contestant, a nervous brunette in a short black dress who said her name was Veronica West.

She delicately walked toward the "Wheel" panel, posed and said, "I've always wanted to do that." Then she rushed to the microphone, gripping it tightly with both hands, and started in with, "Here's what you've won ..."

Feedback filled the room and Friedman grabbed a hand-held microphone. "Look, Miss, let's just try to relax and have fun here. If you want to start over, go ahead, but remember to be yourself."

With that, "Veronica" pulled off her wig and the would-be Vannas rose to applaud the real deal.

Vanna told the next generation to "be yourself, don't take it serious(ly), and have fun." Even among a bevy of women younger and far more artificially enhanced, Vanna was treated as a goddess.

Afterward, having posed for a bunch of photos and chatted with a foot-and-a-half-taller Tommy Tune, Vanna explained her enduring fame.

"I'm the girl next door. I host a show that's very simple and we don't claim that it's anything more than simple," she said. "It's not like 'Jeopardy.' It's brainless. I've made a very good living doing something that's really brainless."

No one in the room could have put it better. In her own way, Vanna's a genius.

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