Stupak's new patent: Winning big by losing big

Losers will love the latest gimmick from gambling marketing guru Bob Stupak.

"Marketing guru?" you say?

That's right. Stupak can turn a liability into an asset quicker than a crooked accountant. Remember his Vegas World hotel-casino? The one that looked like a high-rise prison plastered with gaudy paintings of rocket ships? The one that made architectural critics lose lunch?

For those of you new to town, Stupak's Vegas World was smack in the middle of a crime-infested part of town once populated by hookers, drug dealers, gang bangers and the like.

But where others saw a disaster, Stupak saw an opportunity. And he lured thousands of visitors to the dark, dingy hotel through an "enlightened" (the Gaming Control Board had a somewhat less charitable description for it) promotional campaign.

How did he make it work?

"When they saw what was outside," he says matter-of-factly, "they were scared to leave the joint."

It's that outside-the-envelope thinking that led Stupak to his latest inspiration. And Uncle Sam found the concept so clever it awarded him Patent No. 5,695,402.

Now, you can read the patent's dry, boring legalese to find out what Stupak's brainstorm created, or you can let him explain it himself in language that is, well, a bit more colorful.

"This is a game where you win by losing," says Stupak. "The more you lose, the more you win!"

If you're one of this city's legion of losers, you already want to read more.

"Since 1890, slot machines have been run on the same principle -- you line up three cherries and you win some coins," says Stupak. "Let's say you're playing a machine where the jackpot is $1,000. You line 'em up and win a grand.

"Well, over the years I've watched people line up to play machines they thought were overdue," he says. "And if they played and kept losing, they got P.O.'d and left the joint.

"So I started thinking, 'Why not reward them for losing?' In fact, I figured why not make them want to keep losing by paying them more.

"The way it works is this: You lose a certain number of consecutive pulls and you win an even higher jackpot! Lose 10 times in a row and win 10 grand! You go on a losing streak and you want it to go on forever!"

The actual "winning loss" can be triggered by as few as six or seven events, Stupak says. And the patent is so broad, he maintains, that the concept can be extended to other gambling events, such as sports betting and table games.

Hey, how often have you been on a losing streak at blackjack? Tired of seeing a hot dealer flip over your bust card or hit an eight to make 21 time after time?

With Stupak's "Lucky Losers" concept, you're now rooting for the dealer to keep beating your brains out.

Before you scoff, consider this little subtlety: As your losses mount, you know just how far away you are from hitting the big jackpot. Just two more losers, just one more ...

Why, if you've lost six blackjack hands in a row, bet your next mortgage payment! If the jackpot is big enough, you can't lose!

But keep in mind that if you're playing a blackjack game with a $10,000 jackpot for seven losers in a row, casinos won't let you boost your wager to $5,000 after six losing $2 bets, thus guaranteeing yourself a $5,000 win no matter what happens.

Nevertheless, says Stupak, "The casinos are gonna love this because it'll keep losers in the joints. Now, if they're feeling unlucky, they'll look for one of these games."

Stupak says he's got an agreement in principle with a major slot manufacturer to create a machine offering a version of the "Lucky Losers" game. And, as a true marketing guru, he's already got a slogan:

"Where losers win big!"

The line forms on the left.

(But remember this: No amount of gimmickry can change the fact that casinos won't offer any form of gambling that doesn't pay off for them over time.)

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