Las Vegas Sun

January 23, 2018

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Jon Ralston muses on what it will mean for Nevadans if they follow the governor’s lead

CARSON CITY - I can just imagine the conversation taking place in a car parked on Interstate 15 between Flamingo and Tropicana about 3:30 p.m. Thursday:

Husband: "Hey, did you hear the governor is holding fast to his promise not to raise taxes?'

Wife: "Yeah, he is playing some hardball. Gotta love that. Did you hear he's willing to hold up the whole Legislature just to get that little " fusion " hub where he lives in Carson City? I love that phrase - fusion hub. It sounds so cool."

Husband: "He's looking out for us, like Bill O'Reilly and those folks at Channel 3 here. I know we can't be safe in this state unless the center of the homeland security universe is in the capital."

Wife: "Don't you think it's strange that Sheriff Gillespie and all those other law enforcement officials are opposed to the plan? They think they know more than the governor just because they are on the front lines of the fight? Please."

Husband: "They should just listen to the governor. He knows homeland security from the ground up. He was involved in it when he was in Congress."

Wife: "He was in Congress?"

Husband: "I think so. Hey, and did you know he also is willing to veto the budget and shut down state government if the Legislature doesn't approve that program for at-risk kids put on by the National Guard ? Isn't that funny because we were just talking about that the other day and how important it is in the scheme of what's facing this state?"

Wife: "You said it. We could be talking about traffic or education or health care. But this stuff is what's really important. Jim Gibbons really gets that."

Husband: "And did you know he's also willing to hold up the state budget and maybe make parents worry about the coming school year just to make sure small businesses save two hundredths of a percent on their taxes? He is trying to save them money and not cost us any! He rocks."

Wife: "Makes sense to me. I have been worrying a lot about that business tax. I hardly ever think about education or transportation. Speaking of that, though, how long has it been since we moved?"

Husband: "I know. And we are going to be very late - again. You know the governor is trying to solve that one, too. He wants to take money from the casinos and make them pay for roads. I mean, just look over there at those places - the MGM, Bellagio, Caesars. You think they can't afford to pay for roads? All they do is take, take, take and never pay. Finally, someone is standing up for us."

Wife: "Right on. It's not the governor's fault. At least he is trying. What is the Legislature doing? Those guys are just sitting around and talking about stupid stuff. I don't know why we even need them. Jimbo could do it himself - keeping us safe, building our roads. He is such a breath of fresh air."

Husband: "He really is. And he is so misunderstood. So is that guy who he supposedly listens to - that Sheldon Adelson guy. Hey, he brought us 'Spamalot.' Good enough for me. And, yeah, it might be better if everyone had to pay a little to fix our roads so we didn't have to be sitting here wasting gas and polluting the air. Sure it might be better if they passed a broad-based program with everyone chipping in. After all, we use the roads every day, so we should probably pay a little it, too."

Wife: "Oh, I agree. We could pay a little more on our driver's license or on our car registration if that would help. So long as the casinos and the cabs and the truckers and the rental car guys pony up, too. And why shouldn't they?"

Husband: " Well, I am sure the governor has a good reason for being so narrow-minded and only focusing on one thing and not thinking this through. People should just give him a break. And he's not raising our taxes. That's what counts."

Wife: "Exactly. Who cares about anything else? He sure doesn't. Hey, we're still not moving! And the air conditioning is not working again."

Some crying comes from the back seat.

Husband: "Hey, the kids! I almost forgot about them. We haven't even been thinking about what they might need."

Wife: "Just following in the governor's footsteps. Now let's talk more about that fusion hub "