Monday, May 5, 2008 | 2 a.m.
What's in Charles Barkley's Bag?
Watch Sports Writer Rob Miech open up a bag that belonged to Charles Barkley during his Houston Rocket playing days.
What could possibly be in Charles Barkley’s bag?
Twinkie wrappers? Domino’s coupons? A Gnarls Barkley CD? Those cushy NBA socks he wants from Dwyane Wade? A few stray green chips from Mandalay Bay?
With all the drama of Geraldo going into Al Capone’s vault in 1986 — look it up, kids — we can answer that question.
A friend who knew someone who knew somebody really high up in one of the city’s most popular hotels obtained a Houston garment bag that Barkley allegedly used when he played for the Rockets.
Did I want the thing? Does Mayor Oscar Goodman like gin? Heck yeah, I said, if for no other reason than to fill an Opening Line sometime.
Barkley, who capped a 16-year career in Houston, is an entertaining analyst on TNT telecasts.
It’s unclear whether the Round Mound of Rebound used it, because his name is not stitched anywhere on the exterior. Plus, there are no powdered-doughnut or Buffalo-wing stains.
On the interior? Let’s poke around.
In the front pouch, the one with the Rockets logo, nothing. In the other one, nothing. In a narrow pouch on the flip side, nothing. In shoe containers, nothing.
Inside, Eureka! A plastic Smith’s grocery bag that contains a few items. The cell numbers of other original Dream Teamers? White Castle locations?
Uh, no.
Try four all-access credentials to boxing matches in the name of “Manny Gonzalez, engineering,” and his daughter’s 2004 homework from Charlotte Hill Elementary School.
There are also instructions for using a rifle telescope, a warranty and safety procedures for an air gun, instructions for installing a lavatory waste system and two vague investment receipts from 2005.
Doesn’t exactly reflect a glamorous NBA lifestyle.
Manny, if you want your stuff, send an e-mail. If anyone else is a Barkley or Rockets fan, zip me a note. The most compelling one will get the bag.
Charles, if you’re missing a garment bag, what’s the finder’s fee?
THIS WEEK’S BEST BET
Las Vegas 51s vs. Memphis Redbirds, 7:05 p.m. Tuesday to Friday, Cashman Field
Hot-hitting Terry Tiffee and his 51s mates face the St. Louis farmhands to open an eight-game homestand. For the thrifty-thirsty, Thursday again is dollar beer night.
TICKETS: $8-$13
ON THE WEB: www.lv51.com
ALSO WORTH A LOOK
UNLV vs. New Mexico, 6:30 p.m. Friday, 2 p.m. Saturday and 1 p.m. Sunday, Earl E. Wilson Stadium
The series against the Lobos is the last chance to catch the Rebels at home this season. If you can’t make the weekend games, UNLV also plays Cal State Northridge on Tuesday evening and Wednesday afternoon.
TICKETS: $7
ON THE WEB: www.unlvtickets.com
Rob Miech can be reached at 259-4087 or at [email protected].
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