Celebrity/media NFL picks Week 15

By Sal DeFilippo

Friday, Dec. 18, 2009 | 6:50 p.m.

The St. Louis Rams have gone a long way in establishing themselves as the worst offensive team in the NFL, averaging a paltry 11.2 points per game. When they have the ball, the Rams are the most one-dimensional team in the league -- running back Steven Jackson huddling up with 10 other guys you don’t know.

Want proof? St. Louis has become so nondescript as a unit that this week the team released a guard named Richie Incognito.

How many of you knew who he was? Exactly.

But last week, the Rams took the literal-name thing to an even more impressive level.

“Null” is defined by Merriam-Webster as amounting to nothing; having no value; having all elements equal to zero; of, being, or relating to zero. Essentially, it’s a synonym for St. Louis’ offensive production relative to the rest of the NFL.

So I found it particularly amusing when the Rams trotted out rookie Keith Null to play quarterback – or at least try it -- last week.

Null filled a void (sorry, too easy) left because of injuries to the Rams’ top two quarterbacks. When I saw he went to Texas A&M, I wondered why I had never heard of this guy. That’s when I realized he actually went to West Texas A&M. Yes, that WTAMU, the Division II school that just beat Abilene Christian, Tarleton State and Nebraska-Omaha. Hey, that’s two more wins than the Rams have.

Null threw the ball 44 times in his first career NFL start and on the positive side -- 33 of them were caught. A 75 percent completion rate is impressive, if you ignore the fact that five of those passes were hauled in by the opposition. He’ll certainly remember the Titans after a 47-7 loss in which he averaged only 3.8 yards per pass attempt.

This week, the Rams face the Houston Texans and heading into the weekend, it was unknown whether Null would be back under center again. The reason? The Rams canceled Thursday’s practice because of an undisclosed number of swine flu cases on the team.

At long last, a statistic in which the Rams excel.

Sal’s picks:A 3-0 week momentarily stops the bleeding and puts the still-sad season mark at 17-23-2. This week, we’ll go with Texans -10 over the Null set; the Titans-Dolphins over 41½ and the Steelers -1 vs. the Packers.

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The media/celebrity picks:

Lance Burton, Monte Carlo master magician (24-18)

Chiefs -2½ vs. Browns

Chargers -6½ vs. Bengals

Giants -3 at Redskins

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Anthony Crivello, star of "Phantom -- Las Vegas Spectacular" (21-21)

Saints -7 vs. Cowboys

Titans-Dolphins over 41½

Texans-Rams over 43

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Carrot Top, Luxor headliner (26-16)

Titans -3 vs. Dolphins

Texans -10 vs. Rams

Vikings -7 at Panthers

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Terry Fator, Mirage headliner (20-21-1)

Vikings -7 at Panthers

Ravens -10 vs. Bears

Chiefs -2½ vs. Browns

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Oscar Goodman, mayor of Las Vegas (24-18)

Titans -3 vs. Dolphins

Texans -10 vs. Rams

Chargers -6½ vs. Bengals

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Ryan Greene, Las Vegas Sun sports writer (19-22-1)

Packers +1 at Steelers

Chargers -6½ vs. Bengals

Broncos -13 vs. Raiders

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Alicia Jacobs, KVBC entertainment reporter (22-20)

Browns +2 ½ at Chiefs

Dolphins +3 at Titans

Packers +1 at Steelers

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Kevin Janison, KVBC meteorologist (17-25)

Seahawks -7 vs. Buccaneers

Packers +1 at Steelers

Cardinals -10 ½ at Lions

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Christine Killimayer, Greenspun Interactive sports reporter (18-24)

New Orleans -7

Cincinnati +6 1/2

New Orleans vs Dallas Over 53 1/2

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Wayne Newton, "Mr. Las Vegas" (19-22-1)

Eagles-49ers under 44 ½

Bears +10 at Ravens

Dolphins +3 at Titans

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Frank Caliendo’s Fantasy Studs of the Week

Kyle Orton, Broncos, and Jamaal Charles, Chiefs

The Raiders decided this week to pull Charlie Frye off the scout team to start behind center. Can't blame them. I would choose someone off a Cub Scout team

before I go with Jamarcus Russell. On Sunday Kyle Orton has his first 3 TD day of the season against the Silver and Black.

The box office this year has featured lots of scary features like Paranormal Activity and Zombieland, but this weekend will debut the scariest horror of them all ... Browns versus Chiefs. Neither team seems to have a clue about football. The Chiefs think hash marks are what you find in the car of Jonathan Babineaux. The Browns believe a pancake block is a new menu item at the IHOP. One player will have a huge day, though. The Chiefs' Jamaal Charles.

Last week’s rating:

TOUCHDOWN. Philip Rivers threw for 272 yards and a touchdown against the Cowboys and Thomas Jones ran for 99 yards and found the end zone twice against the Bucs.