Armchair psychoanalysis of your shameless love for FM radio gold

By Erin Ryan

Friday, Jan. 6, 2012 | 5:58 p.m.

The good. The bad. The abysmally bad. I have loved them all through the speakers of my car stereo. I'm a rabid consumer of music with occasional taste (though Weekly managing editor Spencer Patterson might argue that's an overstatement), demonstrated by the following list of favorite songs. They rarely get radio play anymore, but when they do, there is grinning and dancing. Always. Here's a little more about them and a few choice thoughts on what they say about you.

‘Set Adrift on Memory Bliss’ — P.M. Dawn, 1991

The first single from P.M. Dawn’s debut album, “Memory Bliss” was an international hit that expanded hip-hop’s possibilities. Distinctively un-street and wonderfully melodic, it was dismissed by the rap community as a “pop sellout” (probably because it sampled Spandau Ballet’s romantic anthem “True” and involved fly girls twirling through pastel smoke bombs on a beach). From the echoing, choral harmonies to the drum-scratched beat and elevated language of the lyrics, it’s a track I can listen to over and over and over. (Click here to watch the video.)

If you like this song: You have a thing for smooth, structured hip-hop and big dudes in tiny sunglasses.

‘Big Me’—Foo Fighters, 1996

This song is more of a ditty, just over two minutes of breezy riffs and a bass-line that sticks like gum on a shoe. The lyrics are plain and repetitive, bouncing with Dave Grohl’s braided pigtails in the music video. It was his true post-Nirvana rebirth, like the grunge clouds parted onto a sunny, cheeky new day. The video is a spoof on Mentos—featuring folks getting out of everyday messes by popping “Footos”—and won the 1996 MTV Video Music Award for Best Group Video. The sound has a hook in the vein of "I'm Looking Through You" by The Beatles. And the line “But it’s you I fell into,” even with corny delivery, is haunting. (Video above.)

If you like this song: You can’t resist the major chords. Mostly because you came up in the ’90s, and they remind you of the simple, sweet abandon of youth.

‘Naked Eye’— Luscious Jackson, 1997

All-girl alt-rock has never been huge, and the fact that Luscious Jackson only had one song on Billboard’s Hot 100 doesn’t make it an exception. But the fact that the band was signed to the Beastie Boys’ Grand Royal label gives it some cred, and this song is an understated ass-kicker. It’s a quiet kind of rough, with some stylishly murmured raps by lead singer/songwriter Jill Cunniff. I remember taping it off the radio and then going for long runs with my Walkman. It made me feel like a badass. (Click here to watch the video.)

If you like this song: You sometimes feel like a badass while jogging very, very slowly.

‘Hemmorhage (In My Hands)’ — Fuel, 2000

Lead singer Brett Scallions, who joined the band after founders Carl Bell and Jeff Abercrombie saw him perform in a Tennessee bar, is prettier than I am (and looks better in skinny jeans). He gets some serious neck veins in the video because the song is heavy: “Don’t fall away / and leave me to myself / Don’t fall away / and leave life bleeding in my hands, in my hands again.” It spent 12 weeks at the top of the rock chart and was named Billboard magazine’s No. 5 rock song of the decade. (Click here to watch the video.)

If you like this song: You’re too good for Creed but not too proud to indulge in a little snarling, sweeping Top 40 jam.

‘Shackles’ — Mary Mary, 2000

The Atkins-Campbell sisters brought the soaring awesomeness of gospel out of the church and into the street with this track, only a pinch of synthesizer dressing up the strength and tone of their stunning instruments. If I could sing like that I would never stop. They pioneered urban contemporary gospel while going platinum with their debut album, followed by three gold albums and three Grammy awards. To this day, I dance whenever I hear “Shackles,” no matter who is watching. (Click here to watch the video.)

If you like this song: You may not be religious, but you understand what it means to be uplifted.

‘Amber’ — 311, 2001

Probably the best thing ever inspired by Nicole Scherzinger. Lead singer Nick Hexum was engaged to her when he wrote this tribute to her and the band’s reggae roots. She even cameos in the video, which revels in beach bunnies and ratty ping-pong tables and surf. The opening measure is the best moment in the song, which swells just a little into a ballad for Generation Y. It didn’t work out between Hexum and his lady, but the sentiment will live forever. (Click here to watch the video.)

If you like this song: You own Blue Crush, not to mention The Best of Bob Marley and the Wailers.

‘Island in the Sun’ — Weezer, 2001

Thank you, Ric Ocasek. Had the producer not fought for “Island in the Sun” it wouldn't have been included on The Green Album and become the most-licensed track in the Weezer catalog (it’s a favorite of cover bands). There are two versions of the music video. The more obscure depicts a Mexican Wedding, at which Weezer plays the reception. The one you’ve seen has a cadre of adorable baby animals and was directed by Spike Jonze. As the last line fades out, “We’ll never feel bad anymore,” I always believe it (at least for a few minutes). (Click here to watch the video.)

If you like this song: You also like “Say it Ain’t So,” which, unfortunately, won’t redeem you to the music snobs. Not that you give a crap.