Billy Vallie Jr., funeral director of Davis Funeral Homes and Memorial Park, says his facility has implemented mourning shifts in which 10 people are allowed in the funeral home for a short time.
Sunday, April 19, 2020 | 2 a.m.
Billy Vallie Jr. couldn’t imagine saying his final goodbye to his beloved grandmother with the limitations brought on by social distancing guidelines out of concerns for limiting the spread of the coronavirus.
Funeral traditions are meant to help quell the anguish: viewing the body, crowded memorial services, the smell of flowers and the sound of comforting words brings a certain closure. There are plenty of tears — and plenty of hugs.
About 150 people attended her services in February, a few weeks before a Nevada mandate that no more than 10 people congregate out of COVID-19 fears. The directive also applies to funerals, memorials and burials.
Instead, funeral homes have adjusted to the directives as best they can, with limited in-person viewings, virtual services, sanitizing, rotating audiences, caravans, FM streams from cemeteries and balloon releases. But it’s been challenging for grieving loved ones to find the same solace than they might have in the recent past.
“Of course that’s not normal anywhere, ever,” said Vallie, the funeral director at Davis Funeral Homes & Memorial Park in Las Vegas about the makeshift methods of grieving.
The coronavirus has been fatal for at least 124 people in Clark County as of Thursday, but in this circle of life, it’s not the only thing killing people locally. With those deaths come the desire for a funeral.
Vallie last week said that his funeral home has implemented mourning shifts in which 10 people are allowed in the funeral home for a short time. After one groups leaves, the room is disinfected and 10 more are allowed inside. They are also live-streaming from the funeral home’s chapel.
His father’s funeral homes in West Texas have seen caravans arrive with people lining both sides of the street, keeping away but supporting the immediate family of the decedents. Some services at cemeteries, he said, have been broadcast via radio, and people can listen from their cars and release balloons after.
“To make the family at least comfortable enough to know that they did everything they could and did what they needed to do to say goodbye, to give them peace of mind,” Vallie said.
Some families are foregoing funeral services altogether or waiting until the shutdown is lifted for a more elaborate memorial, said Laura Sussman of Kraft-Sussman Funeral and Cremation Services.
Such is the case for Jesus Carrillo, whose father, Jesus Carrillo-Garcia, became one of the first coronavirus victims in Clark County.
Carrillo said that after the tragedy, he received calls from loved ones who wanted to be here with the family but couldn’t because of social distancing protocols. He imagines a memorial for his father, who was very much admired, would have drawn a big crowd.
For now, the family decided to cremate his remains, split them and ship an urn to his native Guadalajara, Mexico. The son was left hoping that maybe this summer they can host a celebration of life to honor his 66-year-old father.
“A funeral to me is you go to see the body and you have a Mass and you see them get buried,” he said. “And we’ll have to skip that and just have a Mass where we remember him … and celebrate his life instead.”
The novel virus is beyond anyone’s control, and the crowd limitations are for everyone’s good, Sussman said. Though, “It’s doubling the grief for them,” she added.
Like others, her funeral home has implemented live streams of services online. She said it’s positive for people who aren’t able to travel because of the virus, and also for the younger generations who are more connected to technology. But it also can be challenging for the older mourners who have a hard time with an internet connection.
In a sense, Southern Nevada is fortunate that the coronavirus hasn’t overrun it with death in the degree that it has in Italy or New York City. Funerals have been banned altogether in Italy, and in New York, crews have been digging temporary graves as funeral homes have become overwhelmed.
“They don’t have the resources to stay safe. You know, I worry that they’ll get sick and then, who’s going to provide the care for other families?” Sussman said of her colleagues in New York.
Vallie said his funeral home has had to process several COVID-19 bodies, and like with any other infectious disease, there are additional precautions his staff takes, and protective equipment they must wear, as they are embalming. He considers his job as important as that of the first responders.
“Because we’re taking that family who’s just lost someone, who’s now grieving,” he said. “They couldn’t see their loved one at the hospital and they couldn’t get near them. And now they can’t have their family around them to say goodbye.”
He was speaking about COVID-19 patients who, due to the highly contagious nature of the illness, aren’t able to have any family at their bedside as they take their last breaths. Most funeral directors go into the business to serve, he said. A longtime family business founded in Texas, Vallie hasn’t escaped it, even when he’s tried.
“Every time I’ve tried to get out of the funeral business, for some reason God always brings me right back to it,” he said. “So, I worked in the hotel business for a while and I was putting people in beds there, and I went back to putting them on their final bed.”
