Imagine what’s said when the cameras are off

By Jon Ralston

Sunday, Sept. 7, 2008 | 2:02 a.m.

With candor taking a holiday the past fortnight — and likely to stay on an extended vacation during the next 60 days — I thought I’d share a frank discussion I overheard the other night in the Straight Talk/Change We Can Believe In bar between a pair of Nevada political operatives, one a Democrat (DO) and one a Republican (RO), granted anonymity lest the dissonance between their spin and reality be revealed:

RO (raises a glass of 21-year-old Glenlivet): Here’s to elitists. (chortles) So do you really think your guy can win Nevada? He won’t play too well in the rurals. They don’t like elitists out there.

DO (between draws on a Bud Light bottle): He doesn’t need to do well there. Have you seen the numbers? We are going to have a 70,000-voter advantage statewide by Election Day. Even the killa from Wasilla can’t overturn that.

RO (chuckling): What was our guy thinking with that? And I can’t believe he’s our guy. I was a Rudy man myself. I cross my fingers every day that there is not some scandal eruption from Juneau.

DO (laughs): I feel the same way about Chicago. Rezko. Wright. Hope no more characters like that bubble up.

RO: Oh no, not from Chicago. (guffaws)

DO: It’s funny how you guys think people care about any of that stuff. It’s all noise. McCain has to pretend for two months he doesn’t know the president’s name or what party he is in. You think you can sell that?

RO: Let me give you an analogy. We elected a guy to the highest job in the state after he was accused of assaulting a woman, hiring an illegal nanny and taking bribes. You think this is a challenge?

DO: Good point. But I bet we don’t see Gibbons at too many McCain events. (smiles)

RO: We got the governor’s schedule just so we know where not to send McCain.

DO: It won’t matter. Our candidates down-ticket don’t have anything much to run on so we will be mentioning Gibbons and Bush in every race, from Congress down to the Assembly. We make fun of Gibbons’ “no new taxes” thing in private, but publicly, we just follow along. We sure can’t have any of our folks tell the truth about what they want to do. Brave, ain’t we?

RO: You mean “restructure” the tax base. That’s clever. How stupid do you think voters are?

DO: I think I should be asking you that one. How does Bush-McCain-Gibbons sound to you? I think that’s a ticket we can win on.

RO: You are afraid because you are on the wrong side of all the issues so it’s all about the cult of personality?

DO: And your point would be? Oh, yes. Sarah Palin was chosen because of her grasp of the issues — on a clear day she can see Russia! And Gibbons? What are his issues?

RO: You already admitted it: It’s the one that works again and again. I know his numbers are terrible but your folks are so timid and the whining rich guys won’t do anything to recall him, so he could make a comeback. Jim Gibbons: The Comeback Kid.

DO: You don’t actually believe that, do you?

RO: Maybe not. But if he doesn’t, you know we are ruthless enough to take him out. He’ll either step aside or we’ll get Dean Heller or Joe Heck to take him out. Or maybe Bob Beers.

DO (sighs): That’s the big difference between the parties. You will do what it takes. We’ll have Barbara Buckley carving up Rory Reid, and Harry at the top of the ticket, probably squeaking by, but causing problems down the ticket. Everyone is so excited for our prospects, but if we just keep playing this go along to get along, we will be killed in the long run.

RO: (raises his glass): I sure hope so.

DO: Well, at least we will get rid of Porter this time. Did you see Dina’s first ad? Making fun of the whole accent thing?

RO: You think that helps her, reminding people she should still be living in Georgia?

DO: It’s light and self-deprecating. And her mom is great. And it’s better than Porter doing his “I’m such a bipartisan guy” act and working together and we are the world. Oh, please.

RO: Yeah, he sounds like Barack Obama.

DO (spits out his beer): That hurts. So you don’t think any issues will be debated this year?

RO: I sure hope not (smiles). That would be bad for business.

DO: I’ll drink to that.